A wise friend once told me "Whatever happens, happens. Don't regret the decision. You can always change it later," and I'm trying to go off those words. I sat in the bathtub last night, that amazingly has these jet things to make it more like a hot tub, but with cooler water...ahh, but I digress (I love baths, sorry). Anyway, I sat there thinking of the decisions that led me to this point and while I do have my regrets about my decisions, I'm gonna try and move on and make something positive about it. I can't stop dreaming or put my life on hold because I'm too busy trying to contemplate the bad choices I make in life. I'm gonna go one day at a time and make something of this new life that I'm starting, whether it be here in NY or in IN.I have to think of the practical, not the impossible. The Beatles once said, "happiness is a warm gun," and it is very much like that in that I have to pull the trigger. Play a Russian roulette, if you will, on my state of being. One day I will pick the right chamber and be really happy, but for now, I'm hitting the empty chambers; it's one game I want to lose at.
I'm gonna get a move on here and make something of myself before time passes me by, and while time does that, it can heal a few wounds on the way.
(Listening to "So Impossible"~~ "...or waiting through all your bad days just to end them..." I'm always playing the waiting game; the life of an impatient person)
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1 comment:
this is beautiful and encouraging. it gives me hope to step foward, approach life's surprises with eager arms, and not be afraid of who i am and what i believe in.
i'm really proud of who you've become. i think you're an amazing person, and i hope we're always always always friends.
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